saw him outside... he got fatter, i got blonder. the winner is obvious.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
She just asked me if her C-section scar turned me on.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
Apparently I'm ahead in the foot race to his dick because I'm not insane. If I'd have known that's all it took, I'd have worn sweat pants more often.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
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