I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
On a list of weird places to get a bj, how weird is in the basement of a pharmacy
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
juast therw a cheeeeesestirng over the fnce. stuckit to sombodys car winheild... gonna luagh if i find it mlted in the mrning.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
She told me she loves her boyfreind while she was giving me head. He must be a nice guy
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
He told me their parents think of me as the "drunk friend"...oddly enough, I'm ok with that
Randomize
