At the hair cuttery. A father here with his daughter just answered his phone "ken's whorehouse"...Now I remember why I used to pay more for haircuts.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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