Asian hipster sighting. About to tackle him and ask him to take me to chinatown
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
New realization: eye makeup remover takes sharpie off boobs
he gave me an orgasm. multiple times. the weird stuff he did in middle school is now irrelevant.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
Puking on the side of the road and legitimately just got a head nod and thumbs up from an 80 year old man on a Segway... What the fuck?
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
His idea of hot sex is sticking his finger in my dark star while doing me Missionary style. You can tell he's from the Bible Belt.
Does he smell like BBQ?
Inside and out.
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
Randomize
