I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
if you really don't think our country's going to shit think of this. Exactly one year from now I will either be in law school or teaching young, impressionable kids, maybe even yours. Try to sleep after that.
she basically told me that her vine videos last longer that I do
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
So I spent all night thinking my bed was floating down a river and telling the cats to get on the bed because they were going to float away. Percocet is strong shit.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Randomize
