i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I'll bet she douches with gravy.
oh so you have enough money for the third eye blind concert but not enough for the morning after pill?
I was so high i believed someone when they told me le moyne beat syracuse
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Thanks for putting the blue stuff in the toilet, it made me throwing up this morning more enjoyable.
I just need to know if he's either really genuine about being in my life or being in my vagina.
I think he thought he was a gentleman because he bought me the most expensive plan b at cvs
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
he was holding his dick in one hand and my boob in the other and i looked down and thought, this is my life
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
Randomize
