I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
Fun fact: he pulled out my nuva ring while he was fingering me.. he looked really confused at me and it a couple of times, so i just said "surprise! not only is it good for pleasure, it's also really handy for storing plastic toys." I'm thinking he's definately gonna call.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
we'll go far in life on tits alone.
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
She's an ex-convict. She actually got stabbed in the face with a pen while in prison. No big deal.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I'm gonna let my dick speak for itself from now on. Seriously, it's always recruiting for me even after 6 hours of drinking.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Someone broke in while we were at the bars, window is shattered but nothing got taken
Noone broke in, matt tried to pull a tyrese and punch through the window... were at the hospital.
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