i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
She came to work with 6 additional layers of make-up, playing every Nickelback song about explicit teen sex, and with a dozen twinkies she bet she could finish without chewing any. I'm investing in a rape whistle.
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
You can't just leave with hair like that
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
Didn't know where your dishes went. Put em in the bathtub. They're stacked taller than you. It's like modern art.
Date with Air Force guy was nice btw. And for my next trick I'll talk him into fucking me in his fighter jet at 30,000 ft.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
