So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
No awkward lesbian experiences without me
Dude judst bought snd smokked tfour white widoew jointsd in Asmsterdam. Wstching the Cvhiefs gsme. Oh Boy.
You are why other countries hate Americans. But I say God bless you.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
My stomach is making the worst sounds, probably because there is nothing but semen in it.
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
I've only hooked up with engineers this year and it may be the best future financial decision I've ever made
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
he had a cock ring. i orgasmed before he even put it in
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