he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
he said I was the best sex he's ever had, handed me a burger king crown and told me to take my walk of shame with pride
I was just handed a mimosa the size of my head. Stay tuned.
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
NEVER PUT A LIT CIGARETTE BEHIND YOUR EAR
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Fuck these runners passing me on campus as I'm waking to dinner. With my huggie. With flavored vodka and rum. Aka yum
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Randomize
