she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I'd steal beers with my tail. If I were a monkey.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
Just gave a urinal high five to a complete stranger. Might not be such a bad night after all
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
Do you remember whose house we're in?
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
It’s just hard to believe you really care about me when u haven’t touched my dick in 2 months
Randomize
