I just love slightly exposed cleavage. Not too much to be whory but just enough to say "your kids will never go hungry"
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
She is wasted and this random lady got her to suckle milk from her tit
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Lol, you asked the waitress to box up someone else's discarded food last night
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
My girl friends dad just asked how I get so drunk and then he passed out with a bloody Mary in his hand on the couch it's 230 do you know where your parents are
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
