Yea I just took my 1st pregnancy test. Turns out I am just fat. Also I haven't been with anyone in 3 months, which is clearly making me crazy.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
85% positive I just found a hair of a certain variety wayyy in the back of my mouth between two teeth while flossing.
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
Well, I plan on starting the night dressed as little red riding hood. Then I plan on finishing the night dressed as a shit show in a red cape.
I went from innocently day drinking to waking up handcuffed in jail. Fuck you game days
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
you got coffee,laid,and a sandwich. that never happens when I work
By 9 pm this evening I'll have accomplished smashing with two different guys in two different time zones in the same day.
Stay hydrated
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
Pandemic Silver Lining: cheap hotel rates makes it easier to have afternoon fun with my side dick
Randomize
