of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
In the middle of having sex, she said "if we continue, we're dating." I then pulled out and sat in the corner, naked. I deserve a Medal of Honor.
"The juvenile turned and faced the officer, unzipped his pants, placed a fresh cigarette in between his legs and preceded to light it with a match"
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
I was making out with him, and then his friend randomly took off my pants and started going down on me. My first semi-threesome was a success.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
Drunkness level: fluent in olde norse
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Nah, i wasn't offended. Having a bridesmaid who you had had multiple threesomes with your future husband would be weird.
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize