Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
my ex just saw me in his brothers bed. fuck yes revenge feels good
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I don't text first unless I'm hammered...so ya I text first a lot
I'm really having trouble focusing on shark week with this erection
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
For 15 minutes straight, he literally did every accent there was, from Russian to Bostonian. The issue: no one could determine whether he was sober, wasted, or anywhere in between
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
It really hurts to walk. Any idea what happened to my hip?
My favorite part was making you pull out your lucky steelers vibrator and show it to jerome bettis at the bar
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