How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
The to do list extremely baked self wrote for me last night says "1. Join gym 2. Passport? 3. Join a gym" And then just a drawing of a squid
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
Note to self... Do not stick your head in a can of paint and try to paint the walls green with your hair
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
