doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
She said my main job as maid of honor is to ensure the groom doesn't find out that each of his seven groomsmen has had his penis inside her.
I have decided today is drunk costume day. That is, i woke up still drunk and found costumes all over my floor. Heck yes. This is happening. Come over. Drink.
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
Ummm. I just wanna say this now: Don't let me invite the band back to the apartment to see my stripper pole.
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Matt just ate a burger out of the trash can in front of the McDonalds. We need to have a serious talk about his drinking.
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
I just fell in love with a beard, the guy it's attached to isn't great but I think I'm going to take one for the team
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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