It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
i want you to know that after i type the word "your" , vagina is next on my auto correct text
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
Bad news. I baked you a cake and one of my fingernails is missing.
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
