Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
So I saw her today...and it was weird...she is just like not pregnant anymore.
Dude...how high are you? of course she isnt pregnant anymore...thats what happens when you give birth
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
On a scale of one to Harambe, how attached were you to your goldfish?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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