i threw up in his kitchen sink and then used a measuring cup to drink water because i couldn't find a clean glass. i just threw up down the stairs. it's gonna be a long walk home.
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
apparently he's bringing me two things i like. he said one was him and i'm assuming the other one is his penis
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
I feel like I have African malaria. I just remembered singing Teenage Dream in full to that biker couple at the bar.
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
He's not drinking on his 21st. Shooting vodka infused Nerf bullets at him would just make a mess and I don't want to be a creep and spike anything... I don't understand awkward boys
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
I trusted a fart in Toronto. NEVER TRUST A FART IN TORONTO.
The guy like flippppped out and made me pay $15 for a car wash. I thought I was being extremely courteous by making sure to puke outside the window
Randomize