I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
when your 30 and im 37 and we're lonely and single, lets make a pact to murder each other.
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
How do you teach a grown ass men how to fuck? Why is good sex so hard to find these days?
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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