i just pooped in tubberware. not a proud day
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
You screamed at oncoming traffic , "five dollars to punch this guy in taint!".
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Randomize
