YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
Rescue me. My white trash great uncle just pulled out his belly at the restaurant to show us how big this woman's tit was
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
Currently emptying half-full wine bottles from fridge into my mouth and refilling with water for later. Drunk survivalist recycling!
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
The pastor just stopped the sermon to lay hands on me. THAT hungover.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Also, lets remember that we have known each other for nearly a decade and our two most recent photos to one another are boxes of plan b
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Randomize
