why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
Dude that's beautiful. I've never heard of someone smoking with their bunny.
I feel like I have a connection with him. A marijuana-induced-spiritual connection.
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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