Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
he can show you his cooooock\nshining, shimmering, splendiddddd
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Just woke up with an entire pack of Oreos in my cheetah onesie. I've been waiting for this moment forever.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I'm so pissed theres no male strip clubs around where we are staying I looked extensively
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I WILL KICK YOU IN THE FUCKING THROAT IF YOU EAT MY FUCKING ICE CREAM.
He answered the door stark naked. When I called him on it he shrugged and said 'casual Friday ' Some boys can't be trusted to work from home.
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