One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
there's nothing like that first "just failed out of my program" beer
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Randomize
