Ooooh. That's not a mole. Uncomfortable.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Have you ever chugged beers in the hospital parking garage with your mom?
dreams really do come true on the roof and drinking again
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
Gregs sitting in the living room in his underwear hitting the bong watching a rob schneider movie. His lack of fuck giving is inspirational
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Booty called 3 guys from my hospital bed
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
I'm going to talk him into letting me tie him up, and then just leave him that way and go meet you for fro-yo.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Randomize
