This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I hope you fall in a pool of honey in an immensely populated region of bears.
I just looked at my iPhone gps history... "the gas station", "the park with a big scary fence", "the trampoline", and, my favorite, "where we were when we were about to do lines off a bible".
he grabbed my head and said "you are a horse. I am leading you to water" pushed it down and whispered "Drink."
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
She was on top, but I lost her at "alright, you look like predator."
Randomize
