Kareoke will never be a sober sport
I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I shaved my pubes to make my cock look like it has a lions mane. to surprise the girl that works at the zoo when she comes over.
I picked my nose. Flicked it. I heard it hit something. Next thing I know, it's floating around in my wine glass.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
I feel like I have two modes: Super fuckin high, or super giddy from caffeine. I have learned to accept this.
I just want you and your enormous dick to be my fucking rebound so we can move on with our lives
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
I guess daylight savings isn't a holiday we need to celebrate for three days...
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