I'm towing my little brother down the road on a sixty year old tractor, we're taking up the whole highway, and no one cares. I love South Dakota.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Moral of the story: don't get pregs or your chances in the beer league are over
I showed remarkable dignity in such a compromising situation. Except I came off as sort of a blue ball giver.
We all told you to throw up but you just stuck your head in the toilet and screamed..
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
He came when Ron Burgundy started playing the jazz flute. How do you think it went?
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I'm setting goals and achieving them. I'd say I'm quite mature for my age.
You're goal was to fuck him and you don't even remember it.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Randomize
