smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
He was making a joke about signing my name on this piece of paper. He has a whole bucket filled with names on pieces of paper. I think thats how he keeps count.
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
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