It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
What are the signs of a concussion? Please don't freak out.
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Never have i felt more judged than when i was throwing up in front of a hello kitty shower curtain at 5 in the morn
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
He took a picture of me to show his boss why he was late...Is that a compliment or not?
Eh, my puke tasted like lemonade, so not too bad
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
Randomize
