Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
you think the cum will come out of moms black shirt?
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
i wish that every time i slipped on a sheet of ice i had the ability to recover with a michael jackson move
I've learned something. I regret way too may Tuesdays in my life to be normal
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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