Ok let's jusst not talk today bc then we'll just do dangerous things but I'll say hello
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
You called me at 2am singing 'happy birthday' while screaming 'I fucking love you' verses, all while eating a burrito and taking a piss off your apartment balcony
Yeah I know, the people below me already told me
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
Randomize
