JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Just don't lie down.. Throwing up upwards is NOT cute the second time.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
According to the boxer briefs I found on the couch when I got home, I take it your date went well??
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
He is farting the alphabet right now. In the goddamned restaurant. You don't get to recommend men anymore. Or restaurants for that matter.
Did you get good sleep?
I dreamt that I was a lipstick lesbian in the 1950s, working at Walgreens and solving mysteries.
So yes.
Randomize
