All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
I like waking up with a slight hangover cause I'm dehydrated and it makes me feel thinner.
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
He was ugly. Like horse ugly. But he was built for power, not for speed.
oh, you know. just sitting in my bed high as fuck wearing a windbreaker and watching british tv.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
He never broke character while fucking me on the neighbor's lawn. I give him a 10 for his dedication to the British accent.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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