Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
after taking her first shot and having her first random hook up she finally feels like she is ready for college
she has no idea
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
I'll admit it. It was a bad idea to sneak a fart out while she was taking a nap. Can you bring me a pair of underwear from my dresser. Preferably the one with the walruses in party hats one.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
If you're signed up as "sober sister" can you do cocaine or nah
why the hell did we go to a rave last night?
we didn't?
definitely went to a bar with strobe lights
JENNIFER. You passed out in a toilet with a color changing light in it.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
The best thing about last night is when drunk Lauren asked cop if she could smoke a joint in front of him. And next thing I remember she’s smoking weed with a cop. How awesome is that.
your mission the party friday: cockblock me at ALL costs. I've cheated on my boyfriend twice. I feel like three times would be crossing some sort of line...
and no, I don't care how how hot he is
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