Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
Just remembered throwing your phone at your face in a half-drunk stupor the other morning when your alarm went off. Thought I should apologize.
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
the only reason you beat me in fntsy this week is bc you wouldnt bail me outa jail in time to set my roster you dick
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
It's 5:30am in Vegas and I'm eating McDondalds next to crying prostitutes.....low point.
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
This guy on Hoarders just said "we're all about 4 or 5 decisions away from shitting in a bucket". True dat
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
I'm in the fetal position trying to figure out a way to get someone to deliver me pancakes.
Randomize
