so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
Just because your phone has a case on it doesn't mean it will survive a 5 story drop out the window.
He grabbed onto my boobs while slipping on ice then proceeded to drag me down with him I'm not predicting head in his future
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
My near death experience also doubled as my coming out story
they all just nodded
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
At what point in life does one make the conscious decision to incorporate capes into everyday life? Like, as a fashion statement?
I'm not sure how to answer that. Is it a general question or one you're wondering about for yourself? Because I don't think you're there yet.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
I had to put my dog down, accidentally outed my brother, and was given a fucking fish sandwich instead of a Big Mac ALL IN ONE DAY! Am I really the person you want to consult for advice? Hhhmmmmmm?
Its the damn oven. I think it wants to eat me.
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize
