is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
I was literally just a half conscious dildo.
I really like you, but I want to get to know you on a time when I am not at drugs.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Apparently you can legally be topless in Boulder, CO. Get on it.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
He seems like a super lonely dude. I bet if I gave him a picture of my tits he wouldn't make me turn in this paper.
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
I threw up in my backpack last night, but at least it wasn't in the pizza box again
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Randomize