Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Only I could do what I did last night and feel perfectly ok working around children the next day
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
All I want is a camelback full of Jameson and the weather to be cool enough for me to wear rainbow spandex. Ugh. Pride problems.
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
its so awesome dude, its like im a magical unicorn or something
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
