I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
This is the last time I call a hotel to see if you or some random guy paid for the room last night.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
The dentist just giggled when he accidentally shot water across my face, I can sense how he treats women.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
She sucked my dick and I swear I almost had to send a search party into her mouth to find it. IT WAS THAT AMAZING.
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
I'm not gonna lie. I'm a little scared.
Good. The Jell-O shots look great.
Dicks are not precious.
Bruise count after new years, 7. 2018 is looking up.
Randomize