I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
She spent a lot of time to get her cleavage to look that good. It would be rude not to stare. It shows you are paying attention. Chicks dig that.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
I'm laying here in fetal position. I feel like a traffic cone
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
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