ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
im pretty sure i just saw someone trying to catch a fish with his penis
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
The dingo escaped by eating a hole through my screen door. It's loose in the city somewhere.
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
This is a hangover from hell. Delivered by the devil himself.
No, he came home, unscrewed all of the lightbulbs, and threw them in the sink.
Randomize