Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
You don't know true terror until you get stuck in a porta potty while frying your face off.
I'm sorry I peed on myself in front of your boy toy. You should tell him I'm usually not that trashy. It was nice meeting him tho..
WHY WOULD YOU SWIPE RIGHT???!!!!!
The same reason I ordered and ate almost an entire pizza last night
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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