shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
Dating is not our generation's strong point. We're an era that's good at getting laid.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
and my herpes radar will keep us safe
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
Randomize
