Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
he fell asleep naked and all I'm doing is staring at his weird balls
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
Randomize
