I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I think condoms have that nasty latex smell to remind you in the morning of how gross you are.
why do my parents always seem to be having way more sex than i do?
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
I want nothing more to get stoned and go to your little sisters petting zoo party but I need to have priorities
Maybe shotgunning 4 days after oral surgery wasn't such a good idea after all...
I keep telling girls I work at the carnival and then guessing their weights. I'm pretty sure I'm about to get kicked out.
No she probably looked into my aura and saw that my penis would ruin her.
Can I get that on a shirt
It was a blind-side dick pic.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
Randomize
