your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
You kept screaming how great you were at drawing poptarts and you insisted on drawing them all over my forearm
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
the best part was at the strip club when he said he was "here to pick up my wife. she's up on stage.....wait that's my aunt". only in Ottawa.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Do not try to steal a picnic table from a park, all you will end up with are sore arms and broken dreams.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
My boobs look fucktastic, I have a booty call on Sunday and a dick photo on my phone. Life is grand!
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
The awkward moment when you're leaving the most attractive guy you've ever been with and you're trying not to shit on yourself. Fucking welcome to my life
Randomize
