is it really weird I just got "suckable tits" in my honesty box and I'm flattered??
Discovered the coffee filter hasn't been changed in a while. I believe the mold has hypnotic properties. Would try it again, but coffee vomit is not pleasant.
i wish my apartment had room service that i didn't have to pay for.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Only you could walk of shame to a childrens pirate themed birthday party
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
That bottle of wine took a part of my soul with it.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
